“Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep.” (Roman 12:15 ESV)

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The above commands are harder than we might assume at first blush.

When we are weeping, it can be hard to rejoice, let alone rejoice with others in their rejoicing. Their own rejoicing can remind us of our own lack thereof. Or we can even be tempted towards envy.

When others are weeping, weeping with them requires the inconvenience of acknowledging their turmoil and entering it with them. This always requires sacrifices, and sometimes we’d rather stick our heads in the sand rather than be disturbed by inconvenient truths.

Both commands, in other words, require de-centering ourselves and centering others, which, in my experience, we don’t like to do. We like to think we like to do this, and we convince ourselves by doing so in ways and at times when it’s convenient. Community is easy when all is well. But even when such community feels vibrant and meaningful, it’s nothing more than a “thick clique” if it reaches its limits at the point when things get hard. That’s not community; that’s just the facade, a cheap replica.

Love loves through the difficulty.